Stars of the Week: 5/18

Here is a celebration of various stories deemed worthy enough to have a star in the Google Reader.

Cinematical: The Cereal Heroes Are Coming to Replace Your Favorite Superheroes
My bets are on Snap, Crackle, and Pop. Three against one? No problem.

Switched: Kid Sells Video Games, Then Donates Proceeds to Hillary's Campaign
I guess it could be worse: he could have donated everything to Al Gore. Someone get this kid a life before he becomes disenfranchised before he's even old enough to vote.

Switched: Violent Video Games Don't Cause Violence, Says New Book
Finally, a blog post we can direct our parents to and say: "Ha! Told you so. No, it's reputable! You just don't understand."

Toddler Left Behind in Airport, Macaulay Culkin Laughs

Somewhere, executives at 20th Century Fox are commissioning a writer to start immediately on Home Alone: The Prequel.

Jun Parreno and his family were stopped at a Vancouver airport to pick up a connecting flight to Winnipeg. Having only a short time to dash from one flight to the other, Parreno's 23-month-old was inexplicably abandoned in the airport as each of the adults assumed the young boy was with someone else.

It wasn't until the staff from Air Canada in Vancouver contacted the family did they realize the young tyke was not in tow. Air Canada covered the cost of two additional flights for the father to retrieve the boy.

While it is good the young child was reunited with his family, it is unfortunate that this happened at all. For all the bad rap that they get, this is one scenario that kid leashes could have prevented. Certainly being tethered is not as psychologically scarring as being abandoned.

Boyfriend Pimps out Teen, Mother Cool with It

Perhaps as a follow up piece, this entry should be called "Don't Force Your Babies to be Internet Sex Kittens."

Fox News reports Todd Barkau and a young girl's mother were arrested and charged with the commercial sex trafficking of the young girl starting when she was 12.

Barkau allegedly forced the girl to perform sexual acts not only with him but with other random guys as well that she learned from the regime of pornography she was exposed to. Later, Barkau turned to the internet to pass along the middle-schooler as a barely legal dominatrix.

Where was the mother during all this? She has been accused of assisting with the sexually deviant acts but also encouraging her child to go along with it. I wonder if this means she was more involved with the logistics of setting up and not actually with any of the action.

I would think a 44-year-old mother would be kind of cheesed if her boyfriend was preferring sex with her daughter but who knows?

In other news, Josef Fritzl now has new, albeit weak, competitors in the Worst Parent of the Year contest.

See also: Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Internet Sex Kittens

Don't Drop Out

Now, all those high school students feeling the burden of their academic careers have something substantial to look forward to when going to college. No, I'm not referring to the unfettered opportunities that (allegedly) come with a higher education. Nor am I considering the numerous people you interact with to broaden your understanding of different cultures and norms. No, in addition, you could have a chance to room with someone of the other gender.

Hooray for societal evolution!

This is perfect for those parents attempting to explain why a university is better than technical college.

For some geeky guys, this may even be the only chance to share a room with a real girl until at least their mid thirties.

Don't Misuse the Voicemail Greeting

Last night at work, I had to attempt to call a customer on his phone to follow up with his account. The phone did not ring and went straight to his voicemail greeting.

While most people use voicemail as a purgatory of sorts for people they really don't want to talk to, some use it for really stupid purposes. You have those who think the Sarah Conner in the orignal Terminator film left a fine message and subsequently piss you off when you hear:

Hello? Hello?!? Fooled you! You're talking to a machine.

You have others who decide spending $1 per month on those ringing tones is too much and use the voicemail greeting for a piss-poor quality recording of the new Fall Out Boy song.

Bringing things back to a point, my customer last night had a voicemail greeting consisting of only the following:

If you a bill collector, stop calling. I ain't got it.

So, not only does this tell anyone else who calls that you are probably a deadbeat, it tells these debt collectors of your unwillingness to pay.

I doubt though that will stop the deluge of calls from Entertainment Weekly and Verizon about those delinquent accounts.

Paying them certainly would though.